So, you think you are a nerd?

Well, prove it!

Since Bill Gates and Steve Jobs made being a nerd cool since they became billionaires, now you have to prove your nerd credentials . . .

Here’s one test – do you watch the popular show called the “Big Bang Theory”?  If you don’t, you are not a nerd – case closed.

With a title like that, no nerd could resist watching  . . .

So, assuming you have watched the show and relate to the characters – you are a nerd if you try to figure out whether the equations shown in the background on the show that Sheldon is working on are correct or not . . .

You are a really smart nerd if you know . . .

Do Sheldon’s comments about string theory and black holes along with his comments about Stephen Hawking send you to your bookshelf to see if Stephen really said that in one of his books – which, of course, you have and can reference quickly . . .

If you were, or were threatened with, being stuffed in your locker in High School by the football team, you bypass all other criteria and you’re qualified!

. . . especially if you are now over 65 now and still remember it . . .  you may not remember much else, but that incident you still remember even if you forgot what you had for lunch today . . .

Another test – we all know that E=mc2 (c squared – which I can’t find a way to type. . . )

Einstein figured that out in his 20s – along with the mathematical proof – thanks a lot Al for making the rest of us feel stupid . . .

Only a nerd would be bothered by the fact he cannot remember what the units are for this equation and what it really means . . .

So . . . you knew this was coming . . .

I decided to find out.

As a frustrated physics major in college who had to switch majors because the math was too hard . . .

We had an architecture  department that had “life drawing” classes you could get credit for attending.  “life drawing” was, in my humble 18 year old opinion, a class where you got to look at and attempt to draw, naked women!

I had found my calling.

I sucked at drawing, but loved the class – don’t remember if I actually did drawings of any of the models – the time went so fast . . .

So, back to E = mc squared . . .

– E stands for energy – measured in Joules – named by complete coincidence for a guy named Joules who figured a way to measure energy.  For the rest of us, 1 Joule is approximately the amount of energy it takes to lift an apple 1 meter.  (do NOT ask me what kind of apple . . .) Also, I mean the fruit, not the computer . . .

– the “m” stands for mass – measured in kilograms – with which anyone buying any kind of drug knows as a “kilo” . . . (2.2 pounds)

– the “c” stands for the speed of light – 186,000 miles per second – or damn fast . . . or “Warp 1” in Star Trek terminology . . .

To put this all in a perspective we all know – 1 Joule per second in energy = 1 watt.  Also amazingly coincidently named after a guy named Watt – who figured this out . . .

So 100 Joules of energy would power a 100 watt light bulb for one second.

So, working out the details of Einstein’s equation shows that energy and mass are equivalent to each other and that if you turn mass into energy, you get a big explosion.  The “Big Bang” refers to the formation of the universe – which was a really big explosion, so let’s reduce it down to something we can visualize . . .

One gram is 1/1,000 of a kilo, so Einstein’s equation when calculated out – as any nerd would do – comes out to mean that if you could convert one gram of matter into pure energy, it would power a 100 watt light bulb for 28,500 years!

Since there are 454 grams in a pound,  one pound equals enough energy to light a 100 watt bulb for 13 million years!

so, this is the mathematical proof, from Einstein no less, as to why it’s so hard to lose weight . . .